Recently, one emigrant subscriber wrote to me that Russia is over:
The best people have already left, and I obviously have nowhere to go, and therefore I pretend that I love my country. Dirty, poor, full of cattle. I don’t believe in “forced” love out of desperation. We lose nearly a million people every year. No one wants to live here anymore.
I can always leave, for example, for permanent residence in Thailand (where I really like it, by the way), but I really don’t want to ever leave Russia. I used to want to work here, I wanted my children to grow up here, I wanted to make my Motherland better, I wanted to serve it with all the strength that I have. But much has changed since February.
A homeland is not just a point on the map. This was the land that gave us energy and strength every day. This was the memory of our ancestors, this was the mentality, this was the cultural code, this was our support and motivation to leave something valuable after we are gone.
And I sincerely loved Russian people very much for many things: for simplicity, for sincerity, for the ability to forgive and love, for an open heart, for not being knocked down, not broken, not “spoiled” by political rules and moral norms. This too has changed. There is so much hidden anger at Putin. Everyone is afraid of where the Motherland is headed. I worry so much over the current lies from the Kremlin. The Motherland I know is no longer.
I have been calmly accepting different views on the war for a long time, but I realized that I cannot communicate with people who lie each day destroying our country from the inside.
When a person in front of me begins to aggressively find fault with Ukraine, for me he does not exist as an interesting interlocutor or someone with whom I would like to spend time. Russians claim to support the war when asked in the market, but secretly despise the Kremlin especially when seeing mothers mourning their dead sons.
Recently I sought to see how the “circles of hell” according to Dante are arranged. It turned out that the most terrible torments await traitors to the truth.
Remember what good Russia used to be. It was at onetime, endless.
As Dostoevsky said: “People speak sometimes about the “bestial” cruelty of man, but that is terribly unjust and offensive to beasts, no animal could ever be so cruel as a man, so artfully, so artistically cruel.“